okay what the actual fuck so i’m laying in bed and i realized my iphone was under me and when i looked at it all the icons were doing that fucking shaking thing and then i thought everything was fine and then checked my phone again and something is missing i think when it was under me i deleted an app but now i don’t know what it is and it’s driving crazy because the first page looks so fucking odd and i want to cry
i touched a dick once and it was the scariest thing in my life because it had a really cold head and i don’t know it wasn’t fun
sometimes the ‘i’ and ‘u’ shouldn’t be so close on the keyboard
ive seen this post umpteen times and ive always thought that if you switched u and i around it wouldn’t make sense like “u touched a” and i literally just realised you meant duck and not dick i swear to god i am the biggest fucking idiot.
I was sitting on my friends bed with her when she came out as gay
and I was looking through a Chinese food pamphlet
so I put it down, looked at her and said “I was going to suggest ordering food but I see now you’d prefer to eat out”
and I don’t think she’s ever really forgave me